Two Scoops. Get Huge.

On Sunday, the Buffalo Bills are down 6 points with a minute to play.  2nd and 10 on the New England Patriots’ 44-yard line.  Ryan Fitzpatrick makes a short pass to Fred Jackson, at which point Patriots linebacker #55, Brandon Spikes, promptly lays him THE FUCK OUT. 

CBS.com - Jackson was hurt at the end of a 9-yard catch and run, when he lowered his head while being swarmed by three New England defenders. Spikes got to Jackson first, lunging into the running back with his left forearm striking Jackson directly on the helmet.

Jackson fell immediately to the ground and fumbled the ball…

Jackson stayed down, because Spikes’ forearm to the helmet had taken him out with a concussion, but as players were leaving the field, B. Spikes was still mouthing off to Bills players and flexing his bicep right up in their face.  I would too if my forearm gave people concussions.

-Tony “Two Scoops” Muscoli

What does one have to do in life to make filming your trip to the supermarket worthwhile?  I assume you just need to be a giant, hilarious meathead.  But if that is the case, why isn’t anybody filming my trips to the supermarket?  My grocery shopping is insanely interesting: Milk, eggs, cheese, chicken, rice, broccoli, fuck you, done. Maybe there is more to it than being a giant, hilarious meathead?  Let’s check the stats:

Rob Gronkowski vs. Tony Muscoli

Rob “Gronk” Gronkowski

Height: 6’ 6"
Weight: 265 lbs
Age: 22
40-yard dash: 4.68 seconds
Bench Press: 23 reps (225lbs)
Makes a Living as a Meathead by: Playing Tight End for New England Patriots
Greatest Meathead Achievements:
-Set NFL Record in 2011 for Most Touchdown Catches by a Tight End with 17.=
-Set NFL Record in 2011 for Most Yards by a Tight End with 1,327 yards.
-Took picture of Porn Star Bibi Jones wearing his Patriots Jersey.
Whatever, not that cool, I bet she is terrible in bed…

.

Tony “Two Scoops” Muscoli

Height: 5’ 11" (on a good day)
Weight: 200 lbs
Age: 20-something
40-yard dash: N/A (hasn’t gone for a run in over 2 years)
Bench Press: 10 reps (225lbs)
Makes a Living as a Meathead by: Working a desk job and posting to Two Scoops in his spare time.
Greatest Meathead Achievements: has at least 1 post with over 100 “Likes” on Facebook.
-Khal Drago Eats 56 Chicken Breasts a Week

Oh OK, NOW I see why people would watch Rob Gronkowski shopping and not me.  Whatever, I love the guy.  He gives Brian Cushing good competition for the title of Two Scoops’ Favorite Meathead.

-Tony “Two Scoops” Muscoli